The Day Between

Today is the day between! Yesterday has brought us to today. That place where the sun doesn’t shine quite as bright..that day when Hope lies in the grave, when dreams seemed to be sealed from the Light. So many of us find ourselves in that place between despair and joy; between the pain of yesterday and the promise of tomorrow. Languishing in the land of “what now?”. Wondering what is next…I can tell you what’s next….RESURRECTION - heart-pumping, joy-giving, lung-filling RESURRECTION!

Because Christ rose from the dead your “in-between” days in the waiting room of life have also been redeemed. Because of Christ’s Resurrection, we can face those unsure times, knowing they are temporary…they are but a fleeting season in the grand scheme of life.  His rising gives us a sense of anticipation and expectation of what tomorrow might hold. 

I encourage you…if you find yourself in that place, resurrection is possible; life is possible. And it’s all because Hope is alive…and Jesus is that hope!

"Happy" New Year 2013

I have to say that this may not be like any New Year’s post you have ever read; especially when it starts with a word like indifference. It’s a very scary word to me. I have learned over the years that it is the opposite of love and really stands for a state of being where no feelings (good or bad) exist. You simply do not care.  

Transparency time: For whatever reason, this is the way that I have felt about the flipping of the calendar from 2012 to 2013. Judging by all the wide-eyed, hope-filled posts on face book, I am kinda feeling alone in this. Not even sure how I got to this place.

As I think back over 2012, there are certain memories that I will hold close forever (new friends, ordination, new car, a new sense of God’s manifest presence in our worship, tons of folks coming to Jesus, bunches of baptisms and new starts).  And then there were the moments that I wish I could forget - but for the life of me, I cannot: shooters where they should never have been, innocence lost, broken hearts over lost friends, etc.

Maybe this is what did it.  For the first time in what seemed like a long time my emotions were taken on a serious roller-coaster ride and this feeling of apathy is a defense mechanism to keep me from all of those ups and downs; to keep me from expecting too much from life and friends and family and experiencing disappointment or hurt when the roller coaster gets too much to handle the centrifugal force of the constant twists and turns threaten to throw me off track. You know there is only so long you can ride that type of roller coaster without feeling the repercussions.  Even the good stuff had their proverbial let-down afterward. You know that moment after the event of a lifetime where you ask yourself, “now what?”.

Well, I think I am feeling the results of all of that, but just as we all are prone to do, we still go through the motions for the benefit of others or even to try and prove something to ourselves. So that is what I did…The family went out with friends last night for dinner and it was wonderful. I sat at a table that was full of hopeful musings and I was genuinely excited for all of it, but after dinner we parted ways and we came home and I told my lovely wife that I was in “a” mood. (she thought I said I was in “the” mood, wink, wink) I clarified that I was in “a” mood or funk and just could not get excited or emotional about “another year”.

So, we kissed Happy New Year and went to bed. I laid there for quite some time (think until 2 AM) before I was able to fall asleep. Then today when I woke up, I found my kids were playing in their rooms and my wife looking through some pictures, so I decided to join her…there were countless pictures of our children, our wedding, and family, friends, vacations, our first apartment, our first house, and then it began to hit me…all of these hopes and dreams of yesteryears and all of them were gifts from God.  Many of them, I never asked for or dared dream of, and yet there they were for me to see. 

For so many people entering a new year, they say the power and hopefulness lies in leaving the past behind them.  (I agree that  there are most definitely things from this past year and others that I would never want to re-live.)  But this morning I found that there was something powerful , rejuvenating, and hope-giving, about re-viewing those unexpected wonders that were all gifts from God.

It made me think twice about the hand of God that has been on my life and that of my family and to begin to look expectantly at the future and know that even though I do not have a list of expectations for the new year that I can check off as they occur, I know that God will be at work and that He has countless blessings, gifts, and lessons for this year and beyond. The indifference melted away with every picture of the past.

So, maybe you have read this, and think, “what a downer of a post.” But maybe, just maybe, you too have fallen in the trap of the same-old, same-old cycle of expectation, resolution, failure and then disappointment.  If you find yourself there, we are kindred spirits.

According to the book of James (1:17 to be exact) every good and perfect gift comes to us from above, coming down from the Father of Lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

That says to me that for every image captured of God’s goodness from the past, there will be just as many in the future. I may not know what they are and even realize that I am looking forward to them, but my God loves me enough to continue to show me why indifference is the work of the enemy and that apathy has no place for a child of the King; whose love is so great that even when we are not looking for a blessing or waiting for Him to fulfill promises, He is at work for our good. 
I encourage you to dig out those albums (digital or otherwise) and begin to look for the hand of God in all of the pictures. Some will show you His favor, some will show you His healing, some will show you old wounds that need healing, and others will show you His hand of leading and correction. But it’s all a blessing…some disguised, but always a gift, just look for it. For nothing is wasted in God’s economy;

every experience, every success, every failure

- He can use it all for His glory and to remind You that He is with you.

Because of the faithfulness and unchanging ways of God, it will be; once again, a Happy New Year!

Ugly Wrapping Paper

Last Sunday as I was leading worship, God spoke to my heart about the power of a Christmas gift. We all know how Jesus came to us; in a cave: messy and damp and likely surrounded by sheep and dove poo. It was not the holiest of environments and yet, that is where He came. And I believe even then He was sending a message of how we can come to Him; unclean and messy. It’s the way that the shepherds came to him, too. They did not run home and freshen up once they received the news. No, they “went with haste” to the place the angel's had told Him.

In all of this, it’s just one picture of how God desires that we come to Him, not only did He provide the way, but He continued to remove the obstacles by showing us the perfect example of that approach; no pretense, no fanfare just simple humility, trust and total reliance.

The other thought He brought to mind was that of gifts. For some reason during this time of year, we have taken a very messy thing, and like the cross, we have done everything we can to pretty it up and sanitize it. We toss tinsel all over it, and light it up with sparkling lights and put bows on it. But I think that this was not the idea that He had when it came to gifts. The gift that God gave us in Christ, was hardly wrapped in the latest fad-grabbing paper and there was certainly no bow.

How about we do the same. There is one gift that He wants from us and that is the gift of our lives. But do not be dismayed. We don’t have to clean it up or put lights on it before we come to Him. The neat thing is that we can give ourselves to him wrapped in stuff that is not so pretty. We can come to the manger and the cross wrapped in our hurt, all-scarred up, with a bow of bitterness over our past, and the ribbon of regret tying it all up. And the cool thing is that He takes that beat up wrapping that we have around the gift of our heart and like a little child receiving a gift on Christmas morning, He rips into it with abandon and throws that wrapping away. He does not fold it neatly just in case we want to save it for some other time. No, He throws it away in the hopes that we will never ask for it in return. 

The gift of Christ and His desire to have a relationship with us is not reserved for Christmas morning. In this time between Christmas and New Years, I pray that you will strongly consider bringing Christ the gift of your life, with all the messed up wrapping, with all the trampled stuff you have been through and allow Him to unwrap it and reveal the you, you were always meant to be. The you He created you to be.

Revelation 5:21 – “Behold, I am making all things new!”

December 2012 - Part 1

Dec. 3 - The gratefulness continues...I am thankful for a messy Jesus. The one who laid aside the garments of the throne room of heaven and came to us in a messy way...among sheep and cattle and mud and hay and dirt. It does my heart good to know that He knows what it's like to get dirty. Our problems and our lives are not perfect and lysol'd..they are not pristine. And here is what is great, He knows that. Not only does He know that, he experienced that. I love the image of Christ in the manger, but I also love the image of Christ with the adulterous woman, or up on the cross. The images are messy, they are all messages of the greater picture of a Savior stooping to us to offer redemption and a relationship. He knows where you have been, He knows what you have done, He knows who you have turned away, but it's never too ugly, too messy, or too graphic for Him. He will get down in your mess with you just so that He can raise you up out of it. What mess do you find yourself in? It's never too much for Christ!

Dec. 4 - This is why it is perfectly acceptable for my 9 year old to still believe in Santa. Eyes that look like these that are filled with wonder and awe and imagination! And knowing this does not dilute the true meaning of Christmas. In fact, I would say that it enhances it. There is no greater mystery or paradigm shift than that if the king if the universe stooping down into a manger to redeem His people...I would say that in order to wrap your mind around that it takes some wonder, awe, and imagination as well. I want to see this look and experience the heart behind it for as long as I can.

Dec. 6 - Today I am thankful for Facebook. Not only for the obvious benefits of being able to catch up with friends that for whatever reason I cannot see on a daily basis but specifically today because it challenges me to be more vocal with my faith and my struggles and all of it. "Why?", you ask. Through most of my grade school days I was a loner. That is until I found people who shared the same likes that I did. Then the choir and the band became my friends and others by extension. But the one thing that I missed out on completely when in high school was how many of my friends may have already been Christ followers. I grieve the fact that in High School, we just did not talk about faith and for that reason, I connected with no one on that spiritual level. As I reconnect with High School friends on FB I am overjoyed (and shocked) at the number of people I walked through the middle and high school halls with who are today proclaiming their faith and love for Jesus Christ. I can only imagine the impact that we may have had on our student population and county had we spoken up boldly..only to find that others shared the same beliefs. I guess it comes as a challenge to me and one that I pass on to you...don't hide your light, others are looking for it. Not just the ones that need it, but those who may already have it that need the encouragement to let theirs shine as well. So...Let your light shine for ALL to see. Love it when I find more family members.

Dec. 10 - Once again I am reminded why a faith family is so important. There are moments in life that are so unexpected and so dark that it can feel as though God has abandoned us. The event is tragic and so heart-breaking that you need to "feel" God. That is what the family of God is for...so that in the moments when God feels far away...we can be His arms and His shoulders. We can be His hands and His feet. Make no mistake, God is near to the brokenhearted but sometimes the only way to feel that is through the kindness and presence of His people, who carry His love with them.

Dec. 15 - OK, This will make some mad, but with all due respect....GOD was in that CT school. Just as He is in every school, office, workplace. For two reasons; Omnipresence (He is everywhere) and the indwelling Holy Spirit in every Christ follower. Officials may not readily be willing to allow prayer at the beginning of the day, but God is in our schools. As believers, we carry the Holy Spirit in us. When we say something like "God is not allowed in our schools" we unwittingly send a message to all of those who claim Christ as Savior that when they walk through the halls of their educational institution they are to keep quiet about their faith because Christ was "left at the door". Perhaps if we encourage them by telling them that no matter where they go, Christ is with them. And that there is no place restricted from God's powerful presence. It offends me because if someone were to say that about my children's school I would say you are absolutely incorrect. My two children love Jesus with all their heart and when they walk into their school, they bring the indwelling Holy Spirit with them, and are greeted by teachers, classroom aides, and administrators who also put their trust in God and who undoubtedly have even prayed for my children and every child they will teach that day. So, I will acknowledge that God is in our schools by honoring the teachers, parents, and children who fill their day with continual prayer for themselves and their classmates and who live by honoring God in all they do no matter where they are.

Dec. 17 - “I can’t go there.” That is a phrase I have used before in conversation but this past weekend, it has been one of my mantras. As I turn the TV off, or scroll more quickly past an article on the net, or put my phone down because now there are pictures of 20 little smiling faces and their heroic sacrificing teachers; I have uttered these words, “I just can’t go there”.  

This morning, the Monday after (I did not think this day could feel worse than Friday…I was wrong), I stopped counting the number of times I had to say, “I can’t go there.” As I was gelling up little man’s freshly shorn Mohawk, or listening to the voice of my almost 6-year-old daughter jabbering excitedly about bucket-filling and ice cream parties, I had to keep saying it over and over. I have felt weak having to say that, but I think that is what the enemy would love us to think.

When Paul wrote his letter to the church in Philippi, he did so under some extreme circumstances. He was in jail for his faith and was undergoing daily torment in some pretty nasty conditions.  His encouragement to the church was this… ^“brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Phil. 4:8) Something I am sure he practiced often.

This is how I will not “go there” and by not going there, I once again have the ability through Christ to defeat the enemy who would love nothing more than for us do dwell in fear and doubt and for us to have endless arguments over whether weapons kill or whether people kill and whether or not one can do so without the other, and on, and on, and on.

See it’s easy to get wrapped up in all of that and “go there”…but it is just as easy to say NO! I will think on these things…whatever is pure, true, noble, right, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.  The enemy is none of those things, darkness does not hold any of these things, fear and pain and doubt hold none of these things. There is power available, through the Holy Spirit that allows us to say those words and to “take every thought captive” for the glory of God.

November 2012

Nov 2 - Thankful for my best friend, Nicole who, in spite of my many flaws, chooses to love me anyway. At times I know it could only be the Holy Spirit that allows her to do that. So I am grateful for a wife who loves God most and allows Him to love through her. She has the most compassionate heart and is obsessed with our children (in the best possible way). I have so much respect for her. She has given up on so many dreams so that I can fulfill my calling in life, there were countless hours of single-parenting, many days of doing all the housework all by herself. It is my heart's desire that God would honor her well for her sacrifices and that all those lost hours and dates and dreams would be realized. I love you Nicole.....I love you more!

Nov 3 - Thankful for my little man. His heart is already so in-tune with spiritual things. He loves with abandon, cares deeply for people and wants them all to love and be loved. He is just one part of my heart that gets to walk around outside of my chest. I am honored to be called Dad!

Nov. 4 - So thankful for the other part of my heart that gets to walk around outside of my chest. Especially when my sweet daughter wears "clip clop" shoes, or ballet slippers, pretty dresses or chases her brother around the house with screams of delight... And when she smiles..no brighter light. I am often stunned by her beauty, and each time it's because I see her mother's eyes mixed in with a love for life and all things pink and purple. She is my sugar monkey and I love her.

Nov. 4 - The man I voted for was not elected last night. However, the people have spoken. Christians stand up and vote for what they believe to be true all the time. As a Christian, too often I am saddened by the double standard that exists from our brothers and sisters.
We want our freedom of religion and to be able to exercise our free will to serve and worship and live as we see fit based on our beliefs and yet too often, we see that as a one way street and we are surprised and offended when others who don't share our beliefs and ideals are simply exercising their ability to do the same.
Please here me, this is not a post about being pro-life or pro-choice, or pro- homosexual or not, or pro- Obama, or pro- Romney, or Christian, or Catholic, or Muslim or Baptist or Mormon, or whichever one of those you or I feel is the right way or wrong way to think.....it is about our responsibility to take these issues close to our heart to the One who can truly make the difference in people's lives. Legislation, laws, and lawmakers are not the hope of the world....but I know Who is!
As Christians let's begin to love people as Christ would have loved them. Speaking truthfully to people with compassion and understanding and allowing The Holy Spirit to change a man's heart so that they may see the things that are perhaps not God's best for their lives. We do not condemn the homosexual, or the woman who chose to have an abortion, the republican, or the democrat, or the libertarian, or the unwed mother, the alcoholic, or the drug user or __________________ (fill in the blank with anyone who thinks or acts different from you).
No, we are called to be the hands and feet of Christ and to share the HOPE that we have...not just to live eternally with God but more so, to be able to live victoriously over the temptations that we ALL face every single day that keep us tied to something or someone that can offer no hope, or peace, or fulfillment.
My heart breaks, not because of who is or isn't in the White House, but because we have a nation divided and when that happens it is not long before we see hatred find its way into our hearts, speech and action.
Christian or not, that is a day that no one should be comfortable with. I am praying for my president, Barack Hussein Obama, our nation, my brothers and sisters and those who don't hold the same views as I do. I implore us all to seek justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with God.

Nov.5 - I am finding it really hard to sum up in a short post my love for God and exactly how grateful and humbled I am that God would choose to love me the way that He has and allow me to lead others to Him by the way that I live. I love how as we walk with Him and seek Him, He allows us to grow in our knowledge of Him and He moves from this story-book character from some long-ago place to a living, breathing, skin-on, hands dirty, feet filthy man who was the living example and perfect blend of compassion, truth, justice, mercy, exhortation, chastisement, grace, forgiveness, friendship, etc. More and more I am coming to love Him even deeper because if we can follow His example of holy living within humanity, we may be able to dispel the unfortunate negative stereotype that "the church" has been labeled with. If we all can, by the Holy Spirit, live, love, and serve like Christ, we won’t need to spend so much of our time and resources on legislating morality (which I do not believe can be done). We can be the hands, heart and feet of Christ and let the Holy Spirit do His work in the lives of people; drawing them as well to a holy life of devotion. Well, apparently I have quite a bit to say about my Savior, I am sure there is a book-load more. But I just knew that a simple "I am thankful for post" was not enough. Jesus may you be glorified in all that I do and say!

Nov 11  - Today I am thankful for people who listen intently to the Holy Spirit in their life and respond with humble obedience. May God continue to whisper in your ear and impart wisdom from beyond this world. By the way....we could all be these people. Just start seeking God, soaking in His presence and then be obedient to spread His light! And trust me, He will always replenish the fuel to keep that light burning.

Nov. 21 - You know those people that come into your life for a season and for varying reasons you no longer get to see them every day, every month, or really ever, but throughout your time apart they are always entering your thoughts? And the thoughts are always nostalgic and warm and wonderful? Well today I am thankful for those "forever family" at least that is what i call them. Because when you do see or talk to or hear from them it's as if no time has passed and you just pick up where you left off. It's a blessing. Although there are more, here are a few i am thinking of right now. Ben & Wendy Bruce, Andrea and Scott Marshall, Adam & Christy Foldenauer, Melody Eidson, Deb Stickley, Cheryl & Neil Ingram, Jimmy & Nancy Janosik, Jason & Melinda Priest, Jody & Debbe Tingen, Danny & Lori Ball, and so many, many more.

Nov. 26 - I am grateful for the story..you know, the one that shapes us and molds us into the people we are. The one whose author is God. The one with all the supporting characters (good, bad, and otherwise). I love the story because no matter how twisted or dark a tale it may have been, it's all redeemable...it's all usable by God to create a testimony of His faithfulness, or His hand of correction, or protection. The great thing is that even if you feel the book is written on your life and it was so messed up there is no way it could end good...I know the One who can turn it all around and instead of leaving you with a tragedy of a tail; if you allow Him to, He can pull a massive twist on it that will leave you astounded and amazed at the depth of His love for you. What's your story?

September 2012

Sept. 29                                                              

9 years ago today, my heart grew by 8 lbs. 7 oz. and it has continued to expand in love ever since, making room for my wonderful boy who has proven over and over again he will be an even greater man than I ever hoped I would be...It comes out all the time in his acts of kindness, his tender heart toward others, his heart for God, his respect and care for his sister, and the way he loves his mommy. T-man, I pray that God will do great things in and through you. I know that life does not always treat us kindly and someday I will not be the coolest dad in the world, but until that day and even beyond...I will love you unconditionally. Every time I say, "I love you" you always respond with, "I love you more." for the record, I do not see how that is even possible. Happy Birthday, little man!

Holy God

While preparing my paper for class I ran across this quote from R.C. Sproul concerning the supremacy and lordship of Jesus Christ and thought it was powerful enough to share.

“God, who created heaven and earth, has made Christ the Lord of the universe. He rules; He does not wait for us to invite Him. He rules us whether or not we want Him to rule. We can be hostile to Hi reign; we can be renegades in His dominion; we may fight against His just empowerment as the King fo kings and Lord of lords, but all of that does not reduce Him to impotency. Our attempts to supplant Him as Lord are impotent because God has decreed His Lordship. “

If God’s desire for our lives is for us to be holy and to live for Him and be obedient to His will, it is no wonder we struggle when we try to do things on our own, in our own strength, we are essentially battling against the will of God in our lives to have control over our actions, thoughts, etc. That seems exhausting to me. I am pretty sure that if there is someone I want “on my side” in life it’s the One who believes in me the most and has only lofty thoughts of me; the One who loves me unconditionally, and whose desire is for me to be my best because of the work of the Holy spirit in me.

I would rather answer the call to holiness and have battle waged against the power of darkness as opposed to battle against God and His perfect love and will for my life.

Whose with me?